Dead Couple
by Nezzy Crazy Plots Inc
Summary: Since Jack Napier’s pregnant wife had died because of his fault, depression drown him. He had decided to kill himself when something happened. Something in the computer’s screen: JACK DON'T LEAVE ME ALONE AGAIN! His wife wasn't dead...but neither alive.
1. Figments of Imagination

This story is related to my other story "all world's a stage", would be good if you read it, will make it easier to understand this, but is not completely necessary. I use narration from that story and they complement each other.

Disclaimer: these charachter are not mine, they belong to DC. allie/jeannie/hearts does belong to me.

**Hello. I'm Female Narrator.**

**We had a meeting regarding this particular issue, and we decided that you simply wouldn't understand the Joke if you only see the finished product. (That would be the Joker and Queen of Hearts)**

**I have to agree with Male Narrator, they don't love each other (well, not anymore and not as before). They simply find each other amusing, a good toy, maybe good company. That's all. A simple competition.**

**There was a time before the Joker, before Harley Quinn, Scarecrow and Queen of Hearts. Before Batman.**

**No criminals masterminds, no murdering clowns, no vigilantes, no sadist manipulators, no mad scientists, or delusional girls trying to be loved by a man without a heart.**

No symbols.

Just people. Normal people living their seemingly normal lives.

**I wont re-tell Batman's story because it has already been told ...Batman Begins rings a bell?**

But we never told you about him. What can make a normal man want to burn down to ashes a complete city?

**Madness is not a good reason. Let me inform you there are a lot of severe mental diseases and thousands of people suffering or making others suffer for it. But most of them are not terrorists. And their mental diseases are not the ones you see related to a terrorist that often. And yet...they are terrorists. **

**They may suffer from mental diseases... but not ones that makes them delusional. Mad. They are not mad. They know exactly what they're doing and why. **

**Well, at least two of them.**

**Madness...The Joker is not mad...he simply needs everybody to understand the Joke...the biggest Joke ever made to humankind, that cruel Joke that destroyed his former life. He knows it. He understands it. He just wants to show it. So does she.**

**But let's talk about him, shall we? After all..you are certainly more interested in him. **

**Why are you reading this, by the way? Because you saw a film? Maybe comics, animated series? Just the Wikipedia? Have you ever wondered if they're not only that, simple characters? because it's not just a film...he's not just a character, any of them are just characters...they are real. Real somewhere else, somewhere you'll never put a toe in...you can only witness some figments of their reality represented by actors from this particular reality.**

**He's aware he's being watched...that's why he makes a good shows: because you were watching a film in 2008. he sensed something while you watched the film, your eyes attached to the screen, following his every movement...he couldn't place his purple gloved finger what was it exactly but he was aware that he had an audience.**

**Here, in this world, Heath Ledger played his role. the worlds "ok" "good" "fine" simply don't cover how good was his portrayal. I don't think "outstanding" and "excellent" would really cover it neither. I lost my voice when I saw it for the first time.**

**After seeing that film, both Me and Male Narrator just ran to our Boss, asking him how was that possible. Had Heath Ledger communicated with the real Joker? Had the Joker just contacted him for him to portray him perfectly, had he discovered that for this world he was a character? **

**We were dumbfounded.**

**The Boss simply said "No, Heath Ledger was simply a wonderful actor...a true genius, a true artist" we didn't need any more information. Heath ledger was a terrific actor. And that's a huge compliment coming from us. We're watching over the bigger liars (or actors, if you want) there are in this universe...or any other.**

Sad as it is, Heath didn't get to enjoy the final product of all his efforts portraying a the supposed madman. Such a pity, we felt awful when it happened. But it happened and there's nothing we can do about it. We're omniscient...but not omnipotent. We only go around seeing how everything works, having the ability to re-tell some events, get into people's minds, turn to the past...but we cant change what's already happened or stop what's happening. Hence our names: Narrators.

**So the first thing I have to make crystal clear: The Joker and Heath Ledger are not by any means the same person. They don't even look alike! although I have to admit make-up artists did a wonderful job.**

**By the way...**

**Have you ever wondered if you are someone's else character? Some figment of someone's else imagination? Hmm? that would make your life a little less real... and the crowds full of unknown faces and names who don't ring a bell are just extras in this film called your life..What would you do in that case? would you really care if I tell you that those people don't have souls, that they don't exist, they are there just to fill a gap?**

**Well...everybody chooses a different path. Some try to ignore that and succeed. Some others just lower their heads and let the Writer do as he please.**

**The Joker's not that kind of people. He rebelled. Completely.**

**You know...this wasn't supposed to be this way. There wasn't supposed to be a Joker... **

**Destiny, the main writer of everyone's lives, films, books, comics or whatever you want to see your life, had decided for Jack Napier to live a peacefull but highly sad life. **

**But Destiny has competition: Chaos. She is simply much more imaginative and a true force of nature...She created the Joker, it wasnt on porpuse...Destiny was mad at her regarding Jack Napier, who was supposed to be one of the saddest stories ever writen.**

**He was supposed to marry Alicia J Narvaez. You may know her as Jeannie. He only called her that to annoy her, knowing well how much she hated her middle name. Normally, he called her Allie. She would get pregnant...and then she was supposed to die. Allie was not some normal housewife...she hid things from him. And he hid things from her. They were ashamed of the true nature of their incomes and pasts. After her death she would let him an bank account which numbers had several zeros, enough to live the rest of his life without financial problems. After her death, he was supposed to mourn her until the end of his life, not daring to touch any other woman, living among old boxes full of her beloved's dresses, feeling pity for himself. He would only go out from the small apartment they lived their short matrimony to buy food, pay the bills and leave some flowers in her tomb every Sunday...**

**Until one day, after three years, his depression would drown the little will to live he had left, and he would put a gun against his forehead and pull the trigger, hoping with desperation some deidity would have some mercy of his poor soul and take him by her side.**

**But then, when everything was supposed to end for Jack Napier, Chaos stepped in.**

**That sunny morning he bought the gun he was going to use to kill himself.**

**He sat in his computer, in her computer, going though old photos, as every morning, so he would never forget the face of the only person that had made him truly happy. And there he was, watching one of the last photos they had taken together. Before everything went to hell and his face ended up deformed with a glasgow smile; irony and mockery of Destiny. He placed the gun fully loaded in his forehead, ready to end his life...**

**Suddenly, a window opened on the computer screen, making a plop sound out of the small speakers. He lifted his head and read in the monitor:**

Allie says:  
Jack don't do it, I'm watching you, put that gun down!  
Allie says:  
Jack, please don't kill yourself.  
Allie says:  
Don't leave me alone again.  
Allie says:  
Put it down, NOW!

Allie is writing a message... please wait.

**He dropped the gun, confused. He rebelled. He would never be be the same again. In that very moment...the Joker was born.**

And everything had started a few years ago, with one simple question:

-Hi, do you happen to have a lighter? Mine doesn't work anymore...

* * *

For those who are reading my other story, would you like me to keep writing this one?

For those who didnt read the other story, would you like to read it and give me your opinions abut it? :P

I hope to read your opinions, I really apreciatte feedback!

Nezzie


	2. Poor as Rats

-Hi, do you happen to have a lighter? Mine doesn't work anymore- says the petite girl with light brow hair pulled in a ponytail, trying to make her green lighter work, shaking it annoyed. She smiles at him shyly, more like _begging_ him for a lighter. She has a _serious addiction_ to that thing.

_**Soooo**_**...now do you undertand why the Joker makes Hearts use a light brown haired wig? Well, if you ever wondered about that, you have your answer, kid. Oh sorry, I'm **_**Male Narrator**_** by the way. Just don't listen to **_**Bitch**_** Narrator, I mean **_**Female**_** Narrator. She is...well, that: **_**a bitch**_**.  
**  
**_Nooo_ we couldn't just stay in the present! We had to go all to the past again. Because She suggested in a meeting, _and She's always right_. If it wasn't for the fact you _can't_ die... I would kill you with my bare hands, ****_dear Femme Narrator.  
_  
_Ehhh where was I_? Oh yeah, descriptions. There you have Alicia, Allie, Jeannie (she did _hate_ that name, if the Joker uses that one again...I'm sure he wouldn't be alive the next morning) but you may know her as Queen of Hearts (that's for the media), Queenie ( Harley and the Joker), Your Highness (depends: If used by the Joker it's sarcasm or annoyment, if used for their goons is because they are about to die), Miss Hearts (Crane at the beginning of their so called relationship, _poor guy really_), and he ended up calling her My Queen._... _**

**Now that I think about it ...**_**She certainly has a lot of nicknames!  
**_  
**I got off topic. Sorry. I've already described her hair, so I won't do it again. Don't insist. Don't look at me like _that_! I'm a little tired ya know? ****_I have two jobs here!  
_  
Anyway, her face is heart shaped (ironic I know), big brown eyes and small mouth, her skin white, some small pink spots a reminder of an earlier case of acne. She's not using any king of make up...She looks like nice and decent young lady in her deep purple dress. _Yeah right_. **

"_**Nice Young Lady"**__**HA!  
**_**  
I think Hearts would **_**die**_** if she ever stumbled upon a picture of her former self. I would say she almost looks cute. **_**Almost**_**. Just because of the dress, let's face it. Well, you may already know she is tiny... but with the oversized man suit you can't tell. Now...she always liked oversized things (I could make a **_**really good joke**_** about that, if you get my meaning, but I'm working and this is rated PG-13... if I keep messing around I'll get fired for **_**real**_**, I have a to pay the rent, ya know?) this dress is too big for her small frame, but she made it fit with a ribbon tied around her waist.  
**  
-Ehh...- he starts shyly.

_**"Ehh.."**_** That's the **_**Joker Superstar**_**! **

**Can't believe it really. He's supposed to be ****verborragic, charismatic, witty, dramatic, intelligent... And the first thing he said to his future wife was **_**"ehh"**_** drolling all over her like a **_**kid**_** who's just saw a huge piece of **_**chocolate**_**.**

_**C'mon boy! Speak**_**! You have a big mouth, ya know? Don't keep your mouth hanging there, **_**use it!**_** Pronunciate, **_**pronunciate!**_

**Ok ok, granted **_**Jack**_**, you always liked tiny girls that look like small ballerinas, like little innocent girls. And dare you to find a girl **_**tinier**_** than this one! **

**Well...unless you count **_**midgets**_**... I mean "**_**small people**_**" sorry, gotta be **_**politically correct**_**!**

**But you haven't reached that point yet as far as I know, and I know **_**a lot.**_

**First I have to talk to someone here: _Listen to me girly, stop making this job harder than it already is. I wouldn't have to describe Jack if you hadn't opened your big mouth and said he doesn't' look like Heath! They would imagine Heath and that would be all! Couldn't you just shut up? Hmm?_**

****

Ok, said that, description: he's rather tall, 6 feet. Despite being tall he looks too boyish for his own taste, nobody takes him _seriously..._

Now...if you dress up like a clown they wouldn't take you seriously either...but he solved that lil' problem looking like _a clown that came directly from Hell_, armed to teeth and without sympathy or caring for human life.

Always a smart boy, Jackie over there.

It's basically his face: He has big brown eyes and every time he is surprised or widens his eyes looks like he's making puppy eyes. His face has an oval shape, nice bone structure and very proportionated. His nose is ok, not that big, not that small. He has a nice smile, he looks like a nice young man who can help an old lady to cross the street....

**I need to say something here:**

_**HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Yeah right**_**...I can't picture him doing that and I have a wild imagination...haha.**_**.The Joker helping an old lady to cross the street!**_

**He was already **_**fucked up**_** as Jack...! **

**I have to say this, dont mock at me: **_**The guy was handsome**_**. But I'm not gay, you heard me**_**, Femme**_**? **_**I AM NOT GAY!**_** You're always telling me **_**that**_**, and one day I'll give you enough proof that I'm not gay...**_**you'll come back begging for more**_**! So...shut up and keep your **_**witty and oh so intelligent remarks for yourself**_**.**_**Yup**_**. The Joker had a **_**mustache and a lock**_**. **

**Anyway, as any guy that has a boyish face and doesn't like it, he's let some facial hair grow and now the was a lock.**

**You never saw **_**that one**_** coming, right? **_**Haha**_**!**

**It's really funny looking at these stuff sometimes...**_**Things have changed so much since then...**_

_**You know how much the media would pay just for that image**_**? If I actually existed in **_**this**_** reality...Well I **_**wouldn't**_** have the picture and I would be **_**looong dead.**_** But in the case that I was a **_**person**_**, alive and with **_**that**_** photo... I would be **_**rich!  
**_**  
His hair is dark brown, not too short to be a "military style" neither long enough to have to pull it up on a pony tail or like he has it nowadays, being the Joker. Just a lot of messy dark brown hair covering his head.**

**The first day they saw each other he was wearing jeans and a red shirt.**

**It was a summer day, the sky clean of any cloud. They met exactly at 10.16 am. Exactly when she said**_** "hi..." **_

_**See how the world works?**_** Simple things sometimes have enormous repercussions...if her lighter would have worked... **_**Gotham's General Hospital would still be there.**__**You know what...?**_** Now that I think about it Hearts and the Joker are using the **_**same colors**_** the other used that day!**

**I bet that's somewhere in their subconscious! Shame I cant go right now!**

-Ehh... sorry I don't smoke- he answers shyly, looking down at her. she looks disappointed. "_In these type of places everybody smokes and this guy doesn't_?"  
**  
Congrats, Jackie boy! There's your first **_**complete sentence**_** to your future **_**wife**_**. We're getting somewhere now.**

-Oh, sorry to bother you- she says looking up to him, still disappointed- I guess I'll have to buy one in the drugstore, bye- she shrugs- _can't believe it I always carry two and now.._- she starts to mutter to herself, heading to the front door.  
**  
Jack, do something, she's **_**leaaaaving!**_

-Hey, _what's your name_?- he asks her raising his voice smiling from ear to ear.  
**  
Really subtle.**

-_Alicia_- she answers turning her head back to him- _and you are_...?- she says motioning with her small hand for him to go on with a little smirk.

**She's always been a **_**bitch**_** and a **_**snooty**_** one. Not like she can control it, probably her background...hmm. **_**Yup**_**. I think that's it. Wont tell ya! Let her speak for herself, she'll tell him!**

-Jack, pleasure to meet you- he approaches, holding out his hand to her.  
-Likewise- she smiles hesitantly at him.  
-I have to buy some..ehhh- he says trying to come up with a excuse to go with her. She only looks up to him, incredulous, a small smile apearing in her face.

**Find a good excuse Jack! **

**He certainly improved since then when it comes to excuses. _Poor Harley... Ouch!_**

-..mints- He finishes, smiling from ear to ear, proud of his excuse.  
-Oh, come to think about it I should buy some as well- she says opening the heavy, wooden door. It is carved and old. It's too heavy for her, and she looks ridiculous trying to push it. He helps her, bemused.  
-Hmm, you always come to this... lovely place?- he starts a conversation. He can't shake off his voice the sarcasm referring to this place as "lovely". She only grins widely and starts to laugh at the joke. He joins her, while they walk to the corner where the drugstore is.  
-Twice a week or sometimes three times- she answers still amused at the "joke"- depends...  
-On what?- he asks her warmly-  
-On how I feel, blood tests...- she says a little ashamed.  
-I guess we have the same problem then- he says in a reassuring voice. She simply smiles at him in gratitude.

**They get to the drugstore and enter. A gray haired man, in his fifties is attending**

-How can I help you?  
- Mints?- he asks the man while trying to find a bill in his pocket. The man takes one little box and hands it to him.  
-Two dollars.  
-Sir, that's really expensive!- she starts complaining defending her new friend-  
-No, it's ok, don't worry- he says annoyed to the man, looking at him with anger, handing him the lonely two dollar bill he found in his pocket "just great"

**I don't know how..but they always had weird stuff...two dollars bills, 50 cent coins, knives that look more like potato peelers, killer spoons... for some reason they always had something unusual in their hands. Maybe because they were highly unusual themselves, and unusual things, if they had any kind of "spirit"... would walk to them willingly.**

**That or they would probably ask for them in a bank...just to match their personality.**

**The gray haired may looks at him puzzled, after being sure is the bill is not fake, he just shrugs and takes it.**

- Mints and a lighter that actually works please. Test it, I want to see it working- she tells him seriously, her face straight. The man only looks at the tiny woman with disdain muttering "_bitch."_

**Sir, I wouldn't call her that...I agree with you but that's a **_**little **__**bit**_** dangerous.**

**Oh right****. It's just **_**Alice**_** here, not **_**Hearts**_**.**

**Jack only looks at her, amused by her bossiness, so ridiculous in a woman that barely reaches 5 feet. **_**Barely**_**.  
**  
- $4.50, _dear_- the man says with sarcasm showing her the flame in the lighter. She starts digging in her purse for something and hands him two bills of $2 and a coin of 50 cents. The man just looks at them smugly "_these two weirdos are poor as rats_!"

**And you're right sir, they _were_ poor as rats...now they're kind _filthy rich._ And I don't know if you're still alive sir... Let me check...mmm Haha! _They killed you!_ Let me read ya the file. It says :**

**_John Witts, murdered by the Joker, while Queen of Hearts was breaking him and Harley Quinn out of Arkham. The Joker cut his throat saying "_hey, have mints?_". Queen of Hearts laughed out loud. Harley Quinn didn't understand the joke. The Joker poured a bottle of beer on his dead body while Queen of Hearts got her lighter and set him on fire saying "_hey! This one certainly works_" making a high five with the Joker , still laughing. Harley Quinn just got into the car, not understanding the private joke between the "siblings._"**

**Yup. They remembered the guy.**

**They walk out the drugstore silently, heading where they came from: _Arkham_****_ Mental Hospital_. **

**It wasn't **_**Arkham**__** Asylum for the Criminally Insane**_** at the time, just a mental hospital where people could have appointments with psychiatrists, knowing only the best worked there.**_**"**_**  
**

**Then it _had_ to change...when Falcone started to send mobsters there, thanks to Crane. The fourth floor became heavenly guarded for the _criminally insane"._**

**Then Joker appeared in scene and the mobsters had to move to the third floor, leaving the fourth floor for madmen (and women) who were not simply criminals...but also terrorists. And it's name changed. **

**Nobody in their right mind would ever want to be treated in the same place those people are.**

**And nobody ever told the complete story of these place, the _real_ story**

**In your universe is known as **_**Arkham Asylum for the Criminally Insane.**_

**That's the way it works, I guess. Us Narrators, whispering stories in the humans ears, so they could tell them to the reat of the world...and they change some things making up a different story, omitting things and adding others.**

**That's why in the "Killing Joke" Jack's wife is referred as _Jeannie_...I just told the guy he called her that to annoy her, but he wrote _that_ and draw her as a blond girl._You have to tell the story by yourself_.**

**You simply cant rely on humans.**

**Where else would this couple met?**

_**In Arkham Mental Hospital, of course!**_

-So...what time do you have your appointment?- he asks her

-_about to start._ 10.30 am- she smiles at him.

* * *

Hello again! I've decided to continue this story, and here's the first real chapter. Thank you so much to everyone who's reviewd this story I'm glad you enjoyed it.

I've decided to tell the story the following way: i'll use the Male Narrator to tell about their lives as friends, their relationship before getting married, their marriage and her death.

And I'll Use the Female Narrator to tell you about his reaction when she died and how he reacts when she re-appears in his life, becoming the Joker.

Now...what would you like to know for the next chapter? His reaction at the computer's messages or how they started being friends at Arkham? Let me know!

I'd love to receive more reviews for this one, I promise I'll update sooner for this one and for "all World's a stage" but I'll start writing shorter chapters, like this one.

Please review, It makes me happy and I'll send you chocolate or cookies, you get to choose :P

Now, seriously, I love reading your opinions. Please leave a review, I apreciatte it a lot and believe it or not, it makes my day.

Nezzie

Re-edit: I've changed a few things, for some reason FF keeps messing around with the structure of my story...is this normal? sorry for those who read as it was and didnt make sense...hope now it does! (5th time I'm doing it, wont do it again..I'm mad at you FF!)

**PS: I know I've submitted this chapter twice... I was feeling horrible about it and about me as a human being, and I though maybe I should erase everything. and i did, at 3. am. then out of respect for those who like the story I re-submitted this chapter. However, I dont think I'll keep writing this, sincerely. Well I dont know how I'll get up tomorrow, but now I'm feeling depressive, I cant even look at my face in a mirror without starting to cry...and for some reason, as stupid and selfish it might sound, when I see that I put all my effort doing something and i dont get any response, it only lowers my self-steem a little more, which is already in the underground. I'm starting to think my writing is really bad, I dont have talent whatsoever and my ideas completely stupid. I really dont know if I'll keep writing these stories...that depends on my mood... this time i dont promise anything about it. maybe I'll stop this thing. I dont know.**

PS (6.24 pm): I'll keep writing, or at least try. again sorry, I have a really low self-steem, and it's not just becasue of reviews, it's my life in general. But I'll keep writing.


	3. The Loonies

**Now where were we? A yeah, when they met at Arkham.**

_**File March 10th 2004: Jack Napier and Alicia J Narvaez.**_****

They enter though the wooden door, still talking. 

-So…what time do you have an appointment?- Jack asks Alicia

-10.30- she says looking at her watch- about to start - And you?-

-10.30 too- he says with a hint of worry

_**Jackie boooooy!**_** Ask her phone **_**numbeeeeeeeer**_**! huge possibilities you'll never see her **_**agaaaaaaain**_**!**

**Really. I **_**still**_** can't believe it! The Joker, the damn **_**JOKER**_** was a **_**shy**_** guy!**

Let's face it. He looks pretty _**pathetic**_** intimidated by that little thing some would call a **_**woman**_**.  
**  
-..Would you..?- he starts shyly, looking down at her with a hesitant smile.

_**Awww!**_** Look at the **_**poor**_** thing! He was **_**reaaally**_** a shy guy...**

I need to do something here. Since I have my license revoked to do anything from people's minds, and I'm working from _**The Files...**_****

_**THE JOKER WAS A SHY GUY! Hahahahaha!**_****

Ok, done. I _**had**_** to say it.**

**The. Damn. Joker. Was**_**. SHY.**_

**It's **_**ridiculous!**_****

Now, some words of _**wisdom**_**...**

_**Joker**_**:**

_**I'm your fan dude!**_** You have two wives! **_**TWO**_**! One looks like a **_**supermodel**_** and the other like a **_**small ballerina**_**! Both of them are **_**geniuses**_**!**_** MAN I LOVE YA! **_****

_**Femme**_** Narrator shut up. The guy's a **_**future genius**_** and he **_**deserves**_** an standing ovation! **_**HE'S GOT TWO WIVES**_**! **

**Do you know how much sex he gets to have? **_**Hmm**_**? And he's got variety too!  
Well... with Harley is pretty much the **_**same old thing...**_

**...not like I'm a perv but I'm **_**omniscient**_** and I see **_**things**_**.**

Now the Joker and Hearts...damn she's _**flexible**_**!**

Well, let's go back to the _**Narration itself**_**.**

**I'm about to ****get fired so I better start to behave like a **_**Little Good Narrator.**_

**And then , when **_**Poor Little Jack**_** was about to ask her phone number (and maybe ask her to **_**marry him **_**right there)... **

**  
... a dark hair****ed doctor in his forties storms out of his office heading to the stairs.**

**To the second floor. Male inmates who are **_**"dangerous to themselves"**_

-Jack, would you wait a _few minutes_?- The doctor says in a hurry, running though the reception, just stopping by to explain him- It's an _emergency_, a man is trying to kill himself!-

**Now Jack is not a **_**puppy eyed guy **_**about to ask his **_**future wife**_** for her phone number anymore.**

He _**looks**_** pissed.**

**Correction: He **_**is**_** pissed.**

Doc, you've just interrupted something_** important **_**there**_**!**_**  
**  
-Ok, Doc- he says rolling his eyes annoyed.

**Because even if we're talking about **_**Jack**_** here...he couldn't care **_**less**_** about the guy **_**dying**_**. He was trying to do something more **_**important**_**.**

_**Ask little Allie her phone number.**_****

This was his priority list at the moment:

"_**First and most important:**_** The girl that I like **_**so much**_** over there? The one that **_**barely**_** reaches 5 feet? The one that looks really **_**cute**_** with her **_**purple**_** dress? I want her phone number. **_**I want it.**_** I. Want. Her. Phone. Number. **_**I want it! **_****

_**Second:**__**The appointment:**_** I don't like waiting here alone, while the receptionist eats her cookies reading her **_**oh so**_** interesting magazine!  
****  
**_**Third:**_** Let the guy kill himself if he wants to**_**, I've got an appointment ya know?"  
**_**  
And then, a second after **_**that**_** a female doctor in her twenties runs to the stairs, turning her head just to say **_**something**_**:**

-Same for you Allie!

_**There**_**! It wasn't **_**that**_** bad, right **_**Jackie-Boy**_**? Now you've got **_**plenty**_** of time to **_**try**_** to get a date with **_**Little Allie. **_****

....Who's not looking that _**cute**_** with **_**that**_** face anymore.**

**Annoyed, angry...**** and she's just cracked her neck **_**soundly**_**.**

So _**feminine**_**.**

She sights and heads to the chairs in the reception room, taking out a cigarette and lightening it.

He sits by her side hesitantly.

-And that's why I _hate_ hospitals!- She hisses angrily.

-I _hate_ waiting...- He says bored- was the guy even _worth_ the try?- he says looking at her, not so sure about what he's about to say...

**Don't worry, say it Jack!** _**Say it!**_

-_Let him kill himself if he wants to!-_ he finishes with a grin starting to appear in his face, hesitantly...

**Oh **_**Poor Jackie**_** was afraid he would **_**scare**_** her, and then think he was an **_**Insensitive Jerk...**_

**She looks at him seriously for one moment. She looks **_**confused, offended...**_****

She's just making a an_** Act **_**to see his reaction. **

**She's always been a **_**manipulative bitch**_**, some things **_**never**_** change.**

He's about to apologize when....  
  
-That's _really_ funny!

**She starts to laugh out loud, truly amused at the "**_**joke**_**".**

Would you seriously think _**she**_** would care about the guy trying to **_**suicide**_**? **

_**Nah**_**, she's more concerned about **_**her appointment.**_****

Both of them start to laugh really hard, looking at each other.

**They are the only two patients in the reception****. They don't seem to care about the receptionist, a young woman that just stares at them puzzled, behind her magazine.  
**  
_"are they laughing at a man that's so depressed he wants to die?"  
_  
**Yeah **_**girly**_**! They're not the most **_**sympathetic**_** people out there, ya know?  
**  
-That was _funny_...- she recovers from heir laughing fit, taking a deep breath- and you're _right_! If he wants to kill himself, just let him do it, not like we're gonna _miss him!_-

**Such a **_**lovely**_** lady. **

**He puts his face in his hands and starts to laugh again, and she joins him.**

He's not laughing at what _**she**_** told: He's laughing at the **_**irony**_** of the whole thing.**

**The fact that she actually **_**laughed**_** one of his jokes. That someone said he was **_**funny**_**. Usually, nobody laughs at **_**his jokes**_**. The only response he gets for them is **_**disapproval**_**. They only glare at him muttering how **_**insensitive**_** he is.**

And out of nowhere, he finds a woman finds him _**funny and entertaining**_**.**

He simply cant believe that the girl he liked so much, _**so much**_** that he **_**dared**_** to talk to her, and **_**almost**_** ask her for her phone number, actually **_**laughed**_** at one of his **_**bad jokes.**_

**And of all possible places...**_**he met her in Arkham.**_****

_**Mhhh Jackie Boy is in love!**_****

Jack and Alicia under a tree _**K-I-S-S-I... **_****

_**Bleh**_**, it's not funny, we already know they'll end up getting married, anyway...**

-...you would be a good _comedian_. Well, I happen to like _that kind of humor_- she says to him, who just takes his face from his hands and smiles to her, more confident.

_**Yeah.**_**..it's **_**her**_** fault that he believes he's actually **_**funny**_**. She told him **_**that**_** and he **_**never**_** forgot about it.  
**  
**Let's see the **_**Ego-Metrer...**_****

....mmmm...It's _**High Sky!**_

-Yeah other people would start - he takes a deep breath and sits straight, putting a severe face and a serious voice, a poor imitation of a school teacher with a British accent- _"Oh My! Jack said that poor man wasn't worth a try, everybody deserves an opportunity, Mr. Napier _blah blah blah_.."-_ he starts to make a gesture with his hand and she laughs harder.

-I know, the same kind of people that tell you _"what you think is not right, you should be more sensitive"-_ she agrees with him, trying to imitate an old lady and failing _miserably_.

-_Hate them..._- he says, annoyed- they come to you with their so called "_morality_"- he makes quotation marks in the air- saying how things _should_ be: If a guy broke into your house and killed all your family....

-Wasn't _his_ fault, was _society's _that didn't _help_ him when he was a _poor kid_ living under a box in the _streets_?- she interrupts him, her eyes full of anger, lost in a memory.

**I think the **_**Little Girl**_** is keeping a **_**secret**_**! Who killed a guy? **_**Who did?**_** Oh yes! **_**Allie did!**_

**  
** -Yeah I heard that one- she continues- That's what everybody thinks is _politically correct_- she says annoyed, marking the last two words.

-So kill all the politicians- he says shrugging, a smile plastered in his face- C_ut them down to ribbons _and feed them to the _poochies_! Then say it's your _not_ fault, Daddy didn't buy that bike you wanted for your birthday and now you're _traumatized_!- he says, making a surrender gesture with his hands _- Hey!_ we can live just fine _without_ _politicians!-_ he ends with a grin-

- Amen, _dear brother!-_ she says laughing harder and getting up

**Oh girl, don't say things you'll regret **_**laaaaater!**_****

He just laughs harder, raising his hands to the air.  
  
-Now let's raise our hands on the air!- she gets up, raising her hands in mockingly- _Alleluia__!-_ she shouts and starts to giggle-

-_Loonies_...- The receptionist mutters behind her magazine, still looking at them. Both Jack and Alicia stop laughing and turn their heads to her, _dead serious._

**Oh girly, I reaaally wouldn't do that...let me check if they did **_**something**_** to you...**

No, you were _**lucky.**_****

_**You got fired.**_****

But they didn't _**forget**_** about you...I think they never forget about **_**anyone**_**.**

The receptionist feels their stares burning in her forehead and mutters "_**sorry**_**".**

Alicia sits next to him, a little smile appearing in her face.

-You're _pretty funny_ too!- he compliments her

-No, I just like _drama_. I cant say anything funny without a _funny person_ by my side- she says motioning at him.

-_Well_...now that we are _stuck_ here for the next couple of minutes...- he starts- what do you want to do Alicia?- he says confidently.

-_Allie_- she corrects him- and I have _no idea_.

-_Ehhh_...- he starts to think- well, we came here for _therapy_, let's do some _group therapy_!- he resolves

-Ok. _You first-_ she agrees with him-

-_Hellooo_ my name is _Jack Napier_ and I'm a certified _Loony_!- he says as if it were presenting himself in an AA group.

-_Hellooo Jack_- she plays along, with a cheerful tone- Hi, My name is _Allie Narvaez_ and I'm a certified_ Crazy Woman_!- she says, marking the last word

**She's always been mistaken by a **_**little girl**_**...so she refers to herself as "**_**woman**_**" every time the opportunity presents itself...**

**..Which doesn't change the **_**fact**_** that you look like a 13 year old **_**Allie-girl!**_

-More like _girly_, you're really _small_!- he says smiling to her sweetly-

-_Good things come in small packages_- she says serious, any traces of a smile gone.

-_Ehh sorry_.. I didn't mean to...- he starts to apologize, mortified.

_**Jackie Boy**_** you could have lost her forever for a little **_**stupid**_** remark!**

And a lot of people would still be _**alive**_**.**

-Don't worry, not like I'm gonna change being _pathetically_ tiny...- she says with her head down, sadness in her voice.

-And I look like a _17 year old!_ - he tries to mend his mistake- and I've just turned 24. Nobody takes me _seriously_- he ends bitterly-

-Well, my case it's _worst_... I'm about to turn 21 and _look at me..._

**He's been looking at you and never though you were **_**ugly**_**... believe me he **_**doesn't**_** think you look **_**ugly**_**.**

-...most people still thinks _I'm 13_...- she says still sad, with her head down.

-We're getting _"depressive tour" _here and...- he tries to avoid that particular conversation going further-

**Doc's back.****...!**

-Sorry Jack, problem solved. The other doctors will take care of him – says the dark haired doctor, going down the stairs, interrupting him-

** ...and **_**Jackie boy**_** didn't her for her phone number.**

-See you around I guess- she says, still sad.

-_Uhh Doc?_ Wait a minute- he turns his head to the doctor, who just smiles to him and goes to his office-

- _Ehhh_...let's not leave that to _chance_ - he smiles at her- _would you give me your phone number, please_?- he asks, suddenly shy again.

_-ok…?-_ she says with hesitation.

- Afraid to give your number to a _Loony_?- he says sadly, regretting his actions.

-No- she answers. He smiles relieved and hands her his cellphone. She starts typing her phone number- Being a _Loony_ myself _you_ should be afraid of _me_- she hands him back the phone-_ here_.

-"_Allie the Crazy Girl_"?- he reads aloud amused, looking at the cellphone.

-So you don't forget who am I- she explains- _You sure have a lot of numbers there!_

**They were nothing but **_**two loonies**_** that met in a mental hospital and she was already displaying her **_**jealousy**_**!  
**  
**Yeah, that's more like **_**her**_**.**

-Just the guys from my former job- he tells her

-ah.

-I'll call you to drink a coffee or something one of these days- he says getting up- I'll go to the Doc's office now, _bye_- he says heading to the doctor's office, smiling.

-Bye- she says after he disappeared trough the door- _Great, now I'm making friends in Arkham._..- she says to herself.  
**  
Jack enters to the Doctor's office and sits down facing the doctor, completely happy and **_**infatuated**_** with the weird girl he's just met.**

- _Doc...?_ Do you believe in _love at first sight_?- he asks him, still smiling from ear to ear-

_**Uh-oh.**_

- You're talking about that girl, _Alicia_?- the doctor asks him worried. He just nods to him, a smile plastered to his face- I'm _sorry_ to tell you Jack- the darkhaired man starts with some hesitation-...I shouldn't be telling you this, it's _professional secret_...- he sighs- _She has a boyfriend._

A/N: Sorry if there are too many typos or gramatical mistakes, remember english is not my first language...anyway, would you tell me if it's horrendous, catastrophic, too bad or simply bad?

Anyway, I just want to thank to all the people who's reviewed this story.

I know it seems really fast for him to fall in love...but he's more in love with the fact that he finds him funny. I just wanted to clarify that. But it's not the same relationship The Joker has with Hearts, it's a completely different type of relationship.

Well, I think that's all.

Please leave reviews, I love them. i'd like to know your opinion about this story and about my english.

Oh, and just one more thing. Which story do you want me to update more often? "_Dead Couple"_ or "_All World's a Stage"_

REVIEWS PLEASE SO I DONT GET DEPRESSED ALL OVER AGAIN (I tend to be depressive :P)


	4. Therapy Session: Jack Napier

A/N: I'm sorry if this has too many gramar mistakes or spepelling mistakes. Dont dounbt on telling me and I'll correct them. I hope you enjoy this chapter. Next one will be about her "boyfriend" and her therapy session.

_**Wanna know how I got these scars??**_****

_**Hellooo Beautiful!**_****

Eh No, I really should stop trying to imitate the Joker. No matter how much I try to follow his steps..._**I wont have two wives**_**.**

I'm Male Narrator, by the way.

Well, where were we? Oh yeah when Jackie Boy was told Lil' Allie had a boyfriend...  
_**  
Look at his face.**_****

Right, you _**cant**_** see, you're reading this.**

Well, _**"sad" **_**is an understatement. **

**He has his eyes widened full of and he's looking to his hands in his lap, shocked. It seems he's about to cry.  
**  
-Doc, you're _serious_? She has a _boyfriend_?- Jack says, his voice affected by his sadness, about to cry.

**Now you must be wondering. **_**"What? The Joker about to cry over something stupid, like a simple girl he likes having a boyfriend"**_****

Yes..and _**No**_**.**

**First, we're talking about a **_**different**_** person here: **_**Jack**_**.**

**Second, why do you think Jack comes here? He's a maniacal depressive, or a **_**bipolar**_**. **

**Just like **_**her**_**.**

**That's why he understood about the blood tests. Most people that used to come to Arkham Mental Hospital (**_**when it wasn't Arkham Asylum for the Criminally Insane**_**) came here because of **_**that**_** or **_**deep depression.**_

**Usually bipolars have depressive states that might last months in which they'll cry over everything and have the most pessimistic view of their own lives. And when they're maniacal they are laughing all the time, making things usually they wouldn't do, they don't sleep and are excited all the time****.**

Not like _**them**_**. They had (**_**and still have**_**) fast cycling. That means they can change their mood almost every day, if not between hours.**

**That's weird between the weir****d: few bipolar suffer of that. Most of them spend months in one mood. They are different: their mood change in days, even hours or minutes.**

**If you dont believe me, look at Jack over there.**

**But the Joker knows how to hide his depression, how to control it: He's a good actor. That or he simply says he has **_**"things to do"**_** and gets into his private room alone until he feels **_**"normal"  
**_

**Enough from the **_**psychiatric**_** explanation. **

**And for the looks of it...Jackie**** Boy got into a depressive state **_**pretty fast.**_

**He was already planning the wedding in his mind I guess.  
**  
-You said something about love at first sight?- The doctor asks, looking at him sympathetically- Would you explain that to me?

- I like her...and she likes _my jokes_- He says shyly, still sad- Too bad she has a boyfriend, right?- he says raising his head, his eyes starting to form tears-

**Hey Jackie boy! Dot worry, you'll end up getting married to her anyway!**

Her _**and**_** the blond shrink!**

-I'm sorry I told you Jack- Says the doctor looking at him concerned- but I didn't want you to raise your hopes regarding her- He explains- it would have been worst if didnt know- He finishes

-I was already thinking about calling her on a date or something...- Jack says with an amused, but still sad voice- I'm just and stupid _freak_!- He finishes laughing bitterly.

**He refered ****himself as a **_**freak**_** before he got his **_**oh so famous scars**_**...**

**It's not the **_**scars**_** what makes him a **_**freak**_**. It's what he does **_**both**_** as the **_**Joker**_** and **_**Jack**_**...**

**You'll see later.**

-Well, tell me why you like her so much- The doctor says, his concern starting to grow every minute it passes.

"_He's about to have a nervous breakdown"_

-She _laughs_ at my jokes, and she's _funny_. And she looks like a _little doll_...with her ribbon tied up to her waist...- he explains suddenly numb, about to cry, not looking at anything in particular- She's really cute...well, who cares? She's got a boyfriend_...lucky guy- _

**Ehhh... no. Let's say the guy doesn't care much about her. And I think the doctor did something really stupid saying she has a **_**"boyfriend".**_

**Because the guy's **_**hardly**_** his boyfriend...more like a **_**parasite trying to feed on her wallet. **_

**Which now it's **_**empy**_**.**__

_  
_-Well- The doctor starts hesitantly- _Maybe you should call her._

-Why? so I get more humiliation and she tells me that_noooo_ she wont go out with me because she has a _boyfriend_? – He gets up and growls at the doctor who jumps in his seat, surprised by the usually shy young man's anger.

"_I cant believe he actually shouted! I should change his medication ASAP.. and I think I shoul__d give him some clonazepan, maybe that will calm him..."_

**Jack starts to hyperventilate and sits down starting to cry. **

"_Why does everything has to go wrong in my life... blame Society and being a Nerd"_

-Well, you're idealizing her- Says the doctor, getting up and palming his back sympathetically- Maybe if you get to know her as a _friend_, knowing that she has _flaws_ like everybody else might help you...- He tries to explain to him

-She's _perfect_ for me, but she's got a boyfriend- Jack states shyly, looking down, tears running though his cheeks- who I'm sure it's a rich blond guy or something like that...which makes me look _more_ pathethic than I am already.

"_He isdefinitly idealizing her...and it's not healthy...ok, let's try something...if he sees she's not that perfect...oh God this may be dangerous...but it may help. Hope this doesnt go wrong and he tries to suicide"_

-_Call her Jack._ You'll see she's _not_ perfect- the doctor presses, still trying to make him feel better and get him about of his _senseless_ infatuation-

-Doc, I don't think I want to talk about this anymore- Jack says getting up the chair and walking towards to the door- I better be out of here, I'm not feeling ok.

-Try not to be depressive about this little incident, focus on something else...- The doctor says to him, concerned.

"_oh God I cant believe it! Jack's supposed to be a genius and now he's acting like a child! This infatuation is just wrong... and he's depressive, that's unusual, he's always in a hypomaniacal state, or mania, never depression. Ok. I should start considering changing his medication, maybe a stronger stabilizator such as lithium 300 instead of quietapine..."_

-Like what? My life is a fucking piece of crap!- he cries desperate.

-Maybe you're seeing your life in a very pessimistic way- the doctor says motioning him back to his sit.

-you're serious?- he says sarcastically, sitting down- I hate my boring job! And I don't even get a decent salary!- he shouts, still crying- _I hate Wayne Enterprises_!- he yells angrily.

**Oh yeah...**_**Bruuuuucey**_**!**

**The**_** Joker**_** worked for **_**your**_** companyyyyy!**

**I need to say something here: Hahahaha!**

**The Damn Joker Worked for The Batman and He Payed The Joker a Low Salary.**

**That's what I call Irony!**

_**Nananana Batman!**_

**Someone should try to write a**_** fanfic**_** about it!**

**Oh right! We're kinda taking over the body of an argentinean chick that calls herself "**_**rat**_**" and writing it. **

-Hey! You're not taking over my body! You're just telling me what to write! And I have reasons to call myself a Rat.

-Yeah, you're doing well, kid.

-I'm 21, don't call me kid.

-We've been here since the beginning of the world! We're older and we can call you kid!

-Oh look like I care! You behave like two stupid teens! Why don't you accept the obvious fact that you're in love.

-we're not!

-You are. At risk of sounding stupid: Femme Narrator and Male Narrator under a tree K-I-S-S...

-Enough! Just write what we tell you...and erase that!

-No, it's funny and you cant stop me from publishing it. Sorry...kid-

_**We, The Narrators and Nezzy Rat apologize about that little inconvenience.**_

**Let's go back to the Narration itself.**

**Soooo...Jack was bithching about his job.**

-...but's not like I can get _another_ job!- he keeps yelling- I'm too young and without experience!-

-Well, but you have a _good future_ at Wayne's Enterprises and...

-Who cares, I bet I wont reach 28 at this rate!- he cries desperate-

**Because at 28 you'll be burning Gotham **_**down to ashes**_**. But dont worry, as far as I know you'll get to live a long life. **

_**Loooooooong**_** life to The Clown Prince of Crime! Hurray!**

-...._One_: I don't have friends!- He starts counting with his fingers at the doctor's face- _Two_: I don't have a family! _Third_: I met someone and I like her enough to get her number and doc you know _I'm a shy guy_! And then _what_?! She has a _boyfriend_! And _NO_, It doesn't end there... I'm the most pathetic man in this world! The only place I can go when I feel like killing myself with a _spoon_...

**Hahaha! Nah, leave that to Hearts, you do really cool magic tricks with pencils! You're good at that!**

-...is here! _Arkham_!- he sits tired, still sobbing- Lately it seems _Arkham is my home..._-He says shyly, looking down again- And sometimes I start thinking it would be better for me to move here as an _inmate_, at least someone will be there to talk to me- he finishes putting his head in his hands and fully crying-

-Jack, your condition certainly _doesn't_ need hospitalization- The doctor says still worried about his abrupt moodswing-

**Doc, He didnt tell you what he's done to Daddy...and anyway, the guy just treatened to kill himself!**

**Agh! We all know that he wont suicide. **

**But I wanted to point out Dear Doc's stupidity!**

-...However, you know you can come _here_ any time you need it, _right_?- He tells him in a friendly tone

-Because is your _job_- he answers bitterly-

-Not only that, Jack. You're an _interesting_ person, and the doctors here like to talk to you, you're certainly i_ntelligent_- the man says smiling at him reassuringly

-Don't deny it: It's your job- Jack says coldly- when I think there's nothing else in this so called life, Little Allie, so cute, so funny appears in the picture and then...- he says with his voice numb-_she has a fucking boyfriend_!- he cries loudly-_Life's not fair doc!_

- There's a lot of women on the world Jack...- the doctor tries to rationalize with him-

**Including Harleen Quinzel who's an intern in this very building. Yup. **

-If _I_ were a woman I would get to be a _spinster_ with 3 fat cats watching soap operas in an old smelly apartment- he says laughing at his own joke bitterly- _Who_ the hell would like to be with _me_?- he laughs- I'm a _disaster_! I don't have _nothing_ to offer to this world!- He says putting his face in his face again, sobbing.

**Again, who would want to be with you? Dr. Harleen Quinzel. And dont worry about Lil' Allie, she's willing to kill to be with you. no. let's re-phase that: Hearts is willing to kill to be with you.**

**And so does Harley.**

-Jack...you're 24 and you have achieved a lot, you graduated as..- The doctor says comfortingly

- As a fucking _chemical engineer_ at 21?- he interrupts him- So _what_?

**Jack...most people dont graduate that young from university. And not with high grades like you did.**

- Your IQ is high, you're an intelligent person who...

- Who cant control his emotions- He interrupts him again - Doesn't matter if I'm _Einstein_. I'm outta here, I cant take this anymore- he says getting up and trying exit the doctor's office-

- Jack, stay here until you feel better- The doctor stops him, motioning him to sit down- As your psychiatrist I cant let you go on this condition. Stay here- The doctor explains to him- _I'll bring you a coffee and some cookies if you want_- he offers to him- Calm down, then you can go home- he says smiling at him, trying to make him feel better-

- doc?- Jack calls him before he get's out.

-Tell me Jack.

-I'll call her... at least as a friend- He says smiling to himself, his eyes still sore- I need her, _I'm in love_- his smile only growls, but it's a smile full of sadness- As stupid it might sound... I think that if there's a God..._he put her in my path for something_- he elaborates- I don't know for what.. but I'll find out.

- Stay here, I'll bring you something and then you can go, Ok?

- I think I need a cookie and a glass of milk, like a 5 year old- Jack says sacrastically-

- _Remember Arkham always has it's doors open for you, Jack_.

**To get **_**in**_**...and to get **_**out**_**. **

_**Arkham Revolving Doors Inc.**_

Well, that's all for today. I want to thank to all the people who reviewd this story, and I hope you enjoyed this.

Please leave revies, they make my day ^^

Nezzie


	5. Theray Session: Alicia Narvaez

"**You don't **_**have**_** to be crazy to work here - But it **_**helps**_**"**

Of things Alan Moore wrote for the Killing Joke... that's the _**biggest truth**_**.**

He got the very _**essence**_** of Arkham.**

Not _**only**_** patients and inmates are crazy... the doctors are **_**too**_**.**

Female Narrator this time. I understand Allie much better than Male Narrator, _**trust me**_**... I know her better than she knows **_**herself**_**.**

That's why I'm the only one who really _**wants**_** to get inside her mind. Male Narrator can go there but he gets himself **_**lost**_**, sometimes **_**deluded**_** by her lies... even knowing they are just that, **_**lies**_**...**

**He wants those lies to be truth so **_**badly**_** that he just watches sadly...**_**trying**_** to believe nothing went so **_**horribly wrong.  
**_**  
Have you ever wondered if we have any other names besides simple **_**Narrators**_**?**

We've been here since the beginning of the times... If you want, we're _**demi-gods**_**.**

**Once in a while we come down to earth and live among **_**mortals**_**, not aware of our **_**true**_** nature. When we die...we come back to the Boss who just smiles at us and always says: **_**"You always manage to end up together, right?" **_****

We were _**Romeo and Juliet**_** once. That's why we choose to name this story "**_**All World's a Stage**_**". Shakespeare was a great guy, just **_**great**_**. When we told him in dreams our story, he wrote it so beautifully...**_**we loved it**_**. **

**And that's why**** we still love Shakespeare.**

The truth, even if we _**seem**_** to hate each other...is that we're just an **_**old married couple **_** who enjoy jokes a little bit too much. **_**That's all**_**. **

**I love **_**him**_**, he knows. And he loves **_**me**_** back.**

But we also love to _**argue**_**...when you've been married for more than **_**ten thousand years**_**, you start to do some other things for a change, not to get stuck into a **_**routine**_**... **

**All in all, we're a very happy couple, still in love like the **_**very first day.**_****

And now we make an_** act**_** of hating each other for **_**your**_** amusement...and **_**ours too!  
**_**  
Anyway... I got off topic. Sorry I do love to tell someone about **_**my husband**_**...**

So, just let me say something here: 

_**Sweetie:**_** I know you're listening, don't start mocking at me and then get mad! And don't call me **_**bitch**_** that often, I don't like starting to say you're **_**gay**_**...! Hell I know you're **_**not**_**! But you are a **_**big fat perv**_**... **_**he he he...!**_****

Anyway... sorry for all this nonsense. I was saying I'm the best to understand Allie. 

**  
****Not Jonathan Crane neither Harleen Quinzel with their multiple titles hanging on the walls of their offices could ever understand her. **

**The Joker and Queen of Hearts are not to be understood by anyone but each other... **

**And Us, the Narrators, of course.  
**

**They weren't **_**meant**_** to be together. Exactly like **_**Romeo and Juliet**_**... They were supposed to die and **_**be done with it.**_****

But they wanted to be together so _**badly**_** that managed to do it. They broke **_**The Rules...**_****

But have _**Rules**_** ever stopped them?**

They found the way... but when they found it, it was too late. Harley was already there, and as any _**old couple**_**... they started to **_**argue**_** just for **_**fun**_**.**

But they do take "_**arguing**_**" to a whole new level!**

Without further ado... _**her**_** therapy session that day. **

-Hello Ally, nice dress- a tall and beautiful african american woman, welcomes her, smiling sweetly at her patient.

-Hello, Joan. Thanks- Allie answers, smiling melancholically at her

**Doctor Joan **_**Leland**_**...she knows . She knows they're **_**not**_** siblings, **_**almost**_** the complete truth...**

-Tell me, how are you?- Joan motions Allie to her sit, still smiling down at her.

-I haven't tried to kill myself in the past two days so I guess I'm fine- Allie sighs

-Allie please don't talk like that- Joan tells her sadly, sitting in front of her- you should start seeing the world under a different light- she crocks her head slightly, her eyes shining- Tell me, how are your dance and _acting_ classes going?- She asks with genuine interest

- Fine, I guess. With the dance classes we're supposed to perform somewhere... and I'm not going to go- Allie answers, looking down at her hands, shaking in the desk- and with the acting classes... well, it's much better. I like being someone else _but_ me, I guess- She lifts her head and smiles back to Joan, who just nods in agreement.

- If you want I can go there and watch you perform, where are you going?- Joan offers to her sincerely- If you feel you're going to be alone I could always...

- No, I don't like crowds, you know that Joan- Allie states bitterly

- It may be a good opportunity to try to overcome your _fear_...- Joan pushes

- You know it's not fear neither agoraphobia. It's just that I don't like to be there in a _stage _- Allie looks at Joan's eyes seriously, her face straight- And I don't feel well, Leo hasn't called yet- She sounds defeated, resting her face in her hand-

-I see- Joan says with contained anger-

-But I'm sure he _will_ call, we're _engaged_, right? I still have the _ring_...- Allie shows a cheap ring in her finger with a wide smile that doesn't reach her eyes. She's about to cry.

- You should start considering that maybe he _won't_ call you anymore, Allie. You haven't seen him in _five months!-_ Joan tries to rationalize with her.

-No, Joan!- She denies with her head, a hint of desperation in her voice- I won't give up on this relationship just because we have _some issues_... We've been together three years! I know he hasn't called... but he did connect to MSN _three weeks ago_, and he asked me for _more_ time... And you have to count that I left the country after..._you know_- She makes a gesture with her hand and Joan stays there, frozen with sadness in her eyes-

-Yes, but do you remember _why_ you left?- Joan recovers from the memory of what Alliee told her she's done

- It wasn't _his_ fault...it was _mine_!- Allie yells, starting to fully cry- I should have told my parents I wasn't studying _law_! I should have told them I was studying _systems engineering_ and maybe they wouldn't have...! - She says in rush, gesturing with her hands maniacally, her eyes showing her desperation and regret-

- Was it your fault your parents disowned you when you lost your job, then?- Joan interrupts her irritated- It was your fault they didn't let you study what you wanted and..?

- Everything's _my_ fault!- Allie stands up, shouting- I should have studied _law_ and be done with it..maybe Leo and I would be _married_ and...!

-Do you think it's _good_ for a fiance to leave you _alone_ when...- Joan also gets up of her sit and embraces her. Allie just cries in her psychiatrist chest, while Joan caresses her head lovingly.

- He didn't leave me, he asked me for time...- she mutters with her voice muffled against her doctor's clothes-I know it's been 5 months I haven't _seen_ him, but I love him Joan, I can't be apart from him... it's killing me! - Allie says, pulling away from Joan's arms, starting to clean her tears to no avail. She can't stop crying- Sometimes I _try_ to sleep and I can't stop asking myself if he's ok _without_ me, if he has _money to pay the rent and the bills..._if he's not wandering the _streets_- She starts to mutter numbly.

-Allie, I know it's _unprofessional_, but I see you more like a _friend_ than a patient...- Joan just embraces her again, more tightly.

**Have you e****ver wondered why Leland works for Hearts so **_**willingly**_**? Why she **_**lets**_** her into Arkham? She loves her **_**memory**_**... and she still has hopes she'll have her friend, **_**Allie**_**, back.**

-You should let him go. He _is_ gone. Accept it, _move on_. Maybe you should consider trying to be with _someone else..._

**But it wasn't like Joan **_**just**_** wanted her to be her friend... she wanted something **_**else**_**. She **_**loved**_** Allie...and **_**still**_** loves her.**

**Even if she's **_**long dead.**_**  
**  
- You know what's to be with this on my finger everyday? - Allie shows her the cheap ring in her finger, looking directly to her eyes.

-I will be completely direct here Allie, this is _enough_- Joan pulls away and motions her to sit in the chair, while she kneels at her level. She sighs and looks at her sadly- He dumped you because you don't have _any money left_. He wanted to marry you because of the _money_- She explains her as if she were a little child - Now, _look_ at the ring and tell me what you see... - She says, taking her small hand and putting it in front of Allie's eyes gently.

-I know it's simple, doctor...- she starts sadly.

-It's _plastic_ Allie!- Joan yells at her angrily and Allie starts to sob soundly- I'm sorry, Allie_, I didn't mean to_...-she hugs her briefly again- But... did he ever want to meet your parents in _three years_?- She pulls away, looking sadly at her eyes-

- No... but he's _shy_, he wouldn't-

- Did he call you or _try_ to stop you when you left?- Joan interrupts her

- No, but it was my decision and...

- Accept it for once Allie, I _hate_ to see you like this. _He left you_. Move on. Nobody that _loves_ you would ever do something like this to you...

_"I would _never_ hurt you, Allie.. but you'll never be with _me_ right? You're just going to end up with a _guy_...never with me. But I'll always be there...trying to _help_"  
_  
**Doctor Leland's **_**married**_**...but she cheats on her husband with a **_**tiny girl**_** that looks too much like **_**Allie**_**...**

And _**Hearts**_** mocks at her every time she can, blackmailing her with **_**that**_** information, and with some **_**old photos**_** of their former friendship. Joan simply cries and Hearts kisses her check and tells her what Joan wants to hear **_**"you know I still love you as a friend, sorry if I'm hurting you, but it's my job."**_****

Joan _**melts**_**, even if she knows it's a **_**lie**_**. She wants it to be the truth so bad that she ends up believing it.**

It seems being _**self delusional**_** is a **_**must**_** to work as a psychiatrist in Arkham.**

Ask Harleen Quinzel..._**or Jonathan Crane.**_**  
**  
-...what about the young man in the reception, I've _never_ heard you _laugh_ in five months of treatment! - Joan says smiling at her. She sits in her desk again, facing her.

**And she's jealous. She wants her to be happy... she's not obsessive.**

_**Not yet.**_**  
**  
-What about him? He was a funny guy I met here. _Period_- Allie shrugs.

- It would be nice to have _real_ friends for a change, Allie.. of course you can always count on me as your _friend_- Joan looks down ashamed, but still smiling- but you know it's _unprofessional_. But do I look like I care about _that?_

-I know Joan, I do _appreciate_ your friendship.

-You know what? I'm gonna prove my friendship- Joan says crocking an eyebrow to her, in a mock conspirative tone- The guy's name is _Jack Napier_. He has basically your same problem.

-_What?_ He's been waiting for his girlfriend to call him for 5 months?- Allie says sarcastically

-No, but he's a _bipolar_, and he's been in treatment for two years. He handles his condition pretty well and you can _learn_ a lot from him. And he's a _good guy_. Jack Napier. That's his name. _Do you want his phone number_?- she asks her mischievously

- He asked for _mine_...- Allie says shyly.

- Oh well, I'm not going to be _that_ unprofessional, _am I_?

- I gave him a _fake_ number- She laughs nervously- I went nervous when he asked and I gave him _my old job's_ number.

- So... Do you want his phone number?

- _No_ - Allie says smiling, her eyes full of anticipation- Jack Napier, right? _Any middle name_?- She questions her

- No, just _Jack Napier_ - Joan tilts her head, confused.

- Well...let's see _how good_ is your system then! - Allie says grinning maliciously and making a dramatic gesture with her hand. Joan simply laughs at her patients antics- I have something to do for the next couple of days I guess! - she ends shrugging

- Oh Allie, this isn't _just_ unprofessional...it's _criminal! _So you're gonna hack our system?- Joan asks her giggling

- I'll give it a _try_...!

- And you'll succeed...I have that feeling- Joan takes her palm to her forehead, amused- Wouldn't be _easier_ for me to get you his phone number?

- I like to improve by practice!- Allie answers clapping her hands together soundly.

- Just out of curiosity...why haven't you hacked _Leo's computer_?- Joan inquires

- I guess I don't want to know...I'm not prepared. If it's really over, I want to learn the truth from his _mouth_- Allie says with any trace of smile gone- And about _Mister Jack Napier._.. I guess a friend is not that _easy_ to get.

-If you _can't_ do it, you can always count me to _open Arkham's doors for you_, I mean if you need a _job_, Allie. You would be a good addition in _the system's department_...

"**Being insane… it's not a **_**must**_** to work here – But it's the best for your **_**mental health**_**"**

_**The Batman, Drama Kills 1988, Alan Moore.**_

**Don't try to find it, it doesn't **_**exist**_**...**

**(not in **_**your**_** world)**

Hello there!

Thanks to chibilover123, Lady Nightlord, grinchis, Miss Mad Hatter, J- Horror Girl Lasgalendil and Nabierre for leaving reviews for the last chapter.

Special thanks to J-Horror Girl and Lasgalendil (my beta). Lasgalendil made me remember some things I forgot about the Narrators and J- Horror checked I didn't have too many grammar mistakes in this chapter

I have a new drawing for "Dead Couple" in my blog, linked as homepage in my profile, if you want to see them. For now I only have two: One of Queen of Hearts and another of Jack and Alicia in Arkham's doors. Tell me what you think about them ^^

As always, please leave reviews! They make my day and I love reading your opinions!

Nezzie


End file.
